Date and place of birth: 4th May 1971 in hospital

Favourite Madness song and video: Song - The Madness ska version of The Krankies hit single ‘Fandabbydozzy’. Video – My wedding video (because I’m in it)

Musical influences: ‘Cheggers’ Plays Pop, The Krankies and my sax teachers’ fist which was used to remind me to practice.

Most embarrassing moment: Happened when playing for a 70’s band. Played a charity gig for the local dyslexic society and asked them to join in the chorus of ‘YMCA’. The song lasted 32 minutes. It just wasn’t going to happen.

Best moment: Whilst in B&Q I saw a measuring tape for £2.99, I remembered that they had the exact same tape for £2.79 in Homebase. B&Q had to give me the tape for 10% less and refund me the difference. Thus I got the tape for £2.50. They were gutted. You could see it in the managers’ face.

Worst moment: getting kicked out of B&Q

Best achievement: swimming 50 meters in my pyjamas at school (handy if I suddenly sleepwalk at the local swimming baths). I got a green badge to sow on my trunks.

Most useless thing ever bought: a measuring tape just to prove the point that price checks are not always 100% correct.

Most irritating bad habit: swapping price tags on DIY products to get them cheaper it is also good for winding up the manager, not taking questionnaires seriously, lying.